Let's cut to the chase here. That new 7.2-kilowatt generator in the new F-150 can offer up some serious power. 7,200 watts is no joke; that's almost ten horsepower. In fact, that's enough—like Ford says—to run a whole suite of power tools.
Which, fine. That's a perfectly reasonable example for the target market. But power tools are probably the least creative thing you can breathe life into with 7,200 watts, though. There's gotta be better uses for that. I'm so convinced of this fact, I'm gonna sit here and run through one of my ideas with you. I think I've got at least five or six, but I don't have all day.
Let's say you want to open a restaurant but you don't want to buy an actual building. Or a food truck. Why, you ask? I'll tell you why. It's because food trucks are way too expensive. I know this because to find cool stuff on Craigslist for you guys to enjoy, I typically start with some remote city like Boise (where I'm certain other auto writers won't look) and then sort by price. After I skim through all of the Chevy Malibus people accidentally listed for 1.2 million dollars, I get to food trucks. Some of them are over seventy grand! That's just too much for our purposes.
Ford hasn't said how much this new F-150 costs, but it's going to be way less than that, even with the 7,200-watt generator. All we need now is some appliances. We're going to need a fridge, probably an electric range or just a full-sized oven, I don't know... a toaster? What kind of restaurant are we talking? I'm thinking a breakfast joint.
I'm looking for all of my necessary equipment on Boise, Idaho Craigslist. I don't know, I mentioned it before, and it just feels right. It's sort of growing on me. They do say Boise is the Paris of Southwestern Idaho.
I'll talk about the oven I decided to get in a minute—why would you sell just the carousel ring from a microwave oven? Look at that. Seven dollars. I feel like that's actually a little steep. Maybe I'll give them a call and haggle a bit.
I ended up going with that $250 dollar one down in the lower left-hand corner. The owner says it has a little bit of wear and tear, and there's probably better ovens out there, but I guess I just like the cut of its jib. Let's find that fridge next—and the toaster.
There's a problem, though. The new F-150 only has one 240v outlet. I'll need two if I want to use a full-sized refrigerator (which, let's be honest, we gotta). Luckily they sell splitters for that kind of outlet. They're like $250, but I guess I need it. I hope I don't blow a fuse or something.
I found this mint RCA fridge for just $159, and I like everything about the listing. The title says the fridge is very nice, there's a smiley face in the description, and look at those pictures. They're least average quality photos and they tell me everything I wanna know. What else can I say? I'm sold.
And as far as the toaster goes, I think I'm gonna try to find a really nice one. You know, let me stop for a minute here. I could rant about toasters all day. You ever notice everyone has basically that same 2-4 slot Cuisinart toaster? The stainless steel one? When's the last time you ever saw a truly unique toaster? They sell "smart toasters" now with touchscreens on them. I don't get that. A smart toaster? It's not like a smart coffee maker that you can just schedule to make coffee in the morning, it can't possibly work like that.
What are you gonna do? Put two slices of bread in your toaster before you go to sleep? It will be stale by the time you wake up. And even then, toast stays warm for such a short period of time. If you're more than a minute late to get it, it's already too cold to spread butter on. The only possible utility I could see for a smart toaster would be presets for the amount of toasting you like. One time my roommate changed the setting on my side of the toaster and I was pretty worked up about it. I had it just right. I called him and I was upset. I mean at the time he didn't understand why I was so annoyed, but eventually, he saw what I meant.
Speaking of worked up, look at that bundle deal for fifty bucks. All of those things for just $50? I mean, I didn't even think about a blender. Shit, we can make smoothies now. And a Fryer, too! Also, check out that extra hot plate. Maybe I can hire a sous chef.
I think we have everything we need now, right? We ended up getting a toaster oven instead of a regular toaster, but toaster ovens are more capable anyway. Plus all of those other goodies. Our total now is just $709 not including the truck, which is great. I'm thinking we find a nice set of cookware and a table for prep, then we should be all set.
I decided to go with a new set of pots and pans. It was tough to find that sort of stuff on Craigslist so I just looked for one of the cheapest and most complete sets on Amazon. I also picked up some knives while I was there. They look... sharp.
As far as a table goes, of course, I didn't get a new one. I found a nice one for $75. It's pretty narrow, too. That'll make some extra space in the bed for me and my sous chef to navigate more freely.
And as far as a cutting board goes, that's a silly question. The table is wood.
That's everything, right? I mean, I still have to buy some paper plates and disposable forks so we can pass the food out—I say "we" because at this point I'm certain you're investing in this venture—but we're not gonna set up any tables or anything. Maybe when that's safer to do we can move onto outdoor seating. There's plenty of room in the cab for some folding tables and chairs.
And oh, I almost forgot! I don't know how to cook a lot of breakfast food. I'm guessing most of our customers aren't gonna be happy with just eggs of four different preparations (if you consider hard and soft-boiled different.) Let me find a cookbook.
You know, I found this cookbook from Emeril Lagasse, and I'm not even sure if there's any breakfast recipes in it. Remember Emeril Lagasse, though? BAM! Right? He's cool, he's edgy, I just trust the guy completely. I'm going with that one. At $21.11 for the hardcover, it's practically highway robbery that we get 150 recipes. There must be some eggs in there.
And no, I'm not gonna make my eggs like Gordon Ramsay. The way he makes eggs is just stupid. Yeah, sure Gordon Ramsay, if you put like a quarter stick of butter in with three eggs, it's gonna taste good. And just look at the way they turn out. They look like snot.
Yeah, there we go, nice. That classic British cuisine where it's just a bunch of whole tomatoes on a plate. Oh man, my stomach is grumbling just thinking about those hot grape tomatoes bursting inside my mouth. Who the hell thought it was a good idea to trust British chefs? Haven't we ever tried their food?
Anyway, the total for this whole shebang is just $941.09. And no, we're not starting an LLC or getting approved by the health department. This is America. We're just going to close the tailgate and book it down the street if some nosy police officer decides he doesn't like the way we operate. That's his problem.
Also, I didn't really know where this post was going before I started writing it, so also I calculated how many F-150s it would take to match the output of the Hoover Dam's power plant. It's 288,888 trucks. That many F-150s would also take up an area about the size of New York City's Central Park, give or take 40 acres. And no, if you filled Central Park with F-150s, you couldn't power New York City. I ran the numbers.
If you want to start a cozy little breakfast spot in the back of your F-150, you can do it for shy of $1,000. This isn't even my best idea, either. If you went Overlanding or something, you could live like a king with the amount of power this truck can put out. It's seriously impressive.
What are your ideas for using this kind of power, though? I wanna hear them in the comments.
